Post-Op Report
Last year, I compared my post-surgical wake-up to the best nap of my life. This year, not so much. I compared this wake-up to my c-section which, if you know the story, involves a spinal block that didn’t work and was one of the worst experiences of my life. I’m a big fan of not glossing over the sucky things, so I am going to be very honest about the recovery: It was not great. 0 stars. Do not recommend.
Silver linings: The anesthesiologist worked wonders and did not want me to become “combative” in recovery because of my rocky history with anesthesia (his words) so he gave me some kind of drug cocktail that kept me nice and polite. It also kept me from breathing for a while, but that's okay-oxygen masks are a good look in a hospital bed.
When I told the doctors and my nurse that I felt similar pain to my c-section, they said my pain level was to be expected because they just did about three times the cutting inside me than a c-section, but they would try to help manage my pain as best they could. They gave me everything in the IV arsenal to help, but nothing worked. My doctors explained (a few times, because I was quite insistent that it was bad) that the surgery was more extensive than even they had planned for, so I was probably going to be in a lot of pain for a while.
Guys, I was literally their only patient for the day. They cleared their surgical schedule for me because they knew it would be extensive, and it was worse than they anticipated. I truly feel like I should have received a certificate or a gold star or something to commemorate the experience, but all I got was a pair of hospital socks to wear with my gown.
Here’s what happened:
They had to do a boatload of work to my insides to even reach the parts they wanted to remove. This involved a lot of cutting, tugging, and pulling apart organs that were fused together with endometriosis and adhesions.
Once they had everything separated, they were able to remove my uterus, ovaries, and the last man standing; my solo fallopian tube.
They also removed my appendix because of a suspicious mass. (side-quest!)
Finally, they were able to remove all active endometrial lesions that they could find. They used a laser to burn those suckers off!
Dr. Nezhat told Clint that it looked like a bomb had gone off inside my body and it was one of the worst cases he has ever seen. THE EXPERT GUY WHO IS ALSO THE BEST IN THE WORLD SAID IT WAS ONE OF THE WORST CASES HE HAS EVER SEEN. (See again: certificate or gold star, please!). He also said that he is confident they removed everything that needed to go, and that I would feel so much better once I’ve recovered.
Side story: The saga of my ovaries. In case you weren’t aware, it’s a big deal to remove your ovaries and you have to sign special paperwork and everything. My doctors asked me no less than 45294745452 times since December 4th if I was sure about my decision, and each time I told them I was sure. I’ve had problems with my ovaries since I was 16 years old and I knew they were a big part of my disease. As such, I was already rendered ineligible for IVF and IUI, and even surrogacy, so why should I keep them? It was a logically simple, yet emotionally challenging decision.
The morning of my surgery, as they were wheeling me into the operating room, they gave me one final chance to change my mind about my ovaries. I did not change my mind.
After the surgery, as I lay in recovery on oxygen and struggling with the pain, Dr. Jackman sat down next to me and said she needed to apologize for asking me so many times if I was sure about removing my ovaries. She said I knew my body well because when they saw what was left of my ovaries, she realized there was no way they could have saved them even if I wanted to. They would have had to call Clint and get special permission to remove them mid-surgery because they were so diseased; there was basically nothing left outside of growths and tumors. She told me this with tears in her eyes, and it was such a validating moment for me. Had I been attached to my ovaries and insisted on keeping them for my fertility, I think I would have had a much harder time accepting that finality. Both Dr. Jackman and Dr. Nezhat told me I had made the best decision for my body and they were able to see that on the inside.
Back to my recovery.
Finally, the drive home. They asked us to stay in the area an additional night because I was having such a hard time managing pain, I wasn’t eating because of the crazy nausea, and my post-anesthesia migraine was monstrous. I hadn’t slept more than an hour or two at a time and was really struggling with getting comfortable. On Thursday morning, I was still nauseous, still had a migraine, still couldn’t manage my pain, and the six hour drive home loomed ahead of me like a nightmare. Let’s just say we didn’t make it far before I had Clint pull over on a freeway off-ramp so I could lament my life choices and repeat “I don’t think I’m going to make it.” I imagine it looked something like this:
I turned the corner last weekend and am feeling a million times better ten days post-surgery. I’m still battling a headache here and there, but the nausea is totally gone and I’m eating real food again! I’m taking ibuprofen and Tylenol around the clock, as directed by my doctors, and I’m taking the “don’t do anything” instructions very seriously, too. Catch more of my exciting recovery adventures (like which pajama pants I'm wearing or the coffee mug of the day) on my daily insta-stories.


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