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Hysterectaversary!

Remember that one time I went to Stanford and had a super-complicated surgery? It’s hard to believe that was already ONE WHOLE YEAR ago. I am happy to report that, while I still have deep internal healing happening, I am basically 100% recovered and feeling so much better! Healing isn’t linear and there have been numerous setbacks in the past year, so I haven’t always been able to keep track of my healing like I thought I would. Sometimes I don’t even realize the progress I’ve made until I look back on previous weeks and months and it dawns on me how differently I feel. For example, I had my COVID booster shot on Friday, so this weekend I’ve been laying low with body aches and the weird “aching skin” thing. It’s a familiar feeling for me because I spent years of my life battling constant internal inflammation that left me with body aches and aching skin (except I didn’t know that any of that was happening inside my body, so I would just randomly, and frequently, feel like I had the flu...
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Peace be with you

Peace: freedom from disturbance; tranquility. Tranquility: the quality or state of being calm. I love the final week of December. The historian in me loves looking back to analyze the different causes and effects of the year. Normally, I am full of goals and hopes for the next year, but these past two years have shifted my perspective. I am not pessimistic or disillusioned, as so many are after the trials of 2020 and 2021 - trust me, I’ve had my moments - but I am finding clarity amidst the (is it just me, or does it seem to be increasing?) chaos.  My only goal for 2021 was to survive. I remember talking to my husband at the end of 2020 and telling him I couldn’t imagine setting any goals for myself because everything seemed too hopeless and hard. In the span of three weeks, my brother had nearly died in an accident, my mom was diagnosed with cancer, and I was facing life-altering surgery with a substantial physical and emotional recovery. Daily life felt insurmountable. What shou...
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First week of summer break

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Things I have done this first week of Summer Break, in no particular order: Gone to the gym (twice, and it's only Tuesday!) Clipped my dog's nails (extra cardio) Made an appointment for my car Cleaned my refrigerator (like, took out all the shelves kind of clean) Played hours of Nintendo with my 7-year-old Played hours of board games with my 7-year-old Paid our Disneyland vacation in-full! Took a nap Finished one book and started another Started overhauling my curriculum for next year Meal-prepped for the week Sent my kid on a camping adventure!   Up next: Catch up on This Is Us Read more books Maybe take another nap Enjoy a 4pm glass of wine on the deck. 
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From The Other Side

If you would have told me a month ago that in four weeks I would be able to shovel piles of dirt and lift boxes of plants, I would never have believed you.  Here I am, 3.5 months post-surgery and finally, FINALLY, feeling healed. I went back to work on April 12th and while that first week was utterly exhausting, it was also exhilarating to return to my classroom and my kids. I had forgotten what it felt like to have a purpose and after approximately 5 seconds around my students, I remembered exactly why I’m a teacher. A classroom is where I am meant to be and where I am happiest! Well, aside from the beach and our cabin, at least. (wink)   In this past week, I have felt more healed than ever before. Instead of falling onto the couch everyday after work, I came home and worked in the yard (in between Little League games, of course)! And instead of crawling into bed around 7pm each night, I lasted until between 8-9 PM. The best part has been actually feeling TIRED at bedti...
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My Marion

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While recovering from surgery, I’ve gone down the rabbit hole of Will & Grace, one of my most favorite TV shows of all time. I didn’t realize it was on Hulu, and I haven’t really stopped watching it since January because this is the longest recovery of all time and I’ve spent three months on the couch I love it so much. I mean, Karen Walker is basically a national treasure, amirite? Karen Walker aside, something I did not expect to fill my heart and mind while watching Will & Grace is the memory of Marion. You see, when I was in high school I used to go to Marion’s house everyday before cheerleading practice at 4:00 and, in that one-hour of time, I always watched Will & Grace. Sometimes Marion was home, sometimes she wasn’t, but her house was always open to me.   Marion's house. Insert wistful sigh here.    Marion’s house was Easter Bunny sightings on Easter Eve, Saturdays after the Holiday Parade, pizza, movies, and Garfield books. Her house was a carpe...
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Things are looking up!

I am truly overwhelmed at the outpouring of love received since my last post. In fact, I’m convinced all that out-poured love was full of healing powers because I am officially leaps and bounds beyond where I was two weeks ago!    If you’re just tuning in, my last few posts were basically sad pity-parties that I held for myself in the form of a blog. I was disappointed that my healing process was stunted and I was unable to do anything to feel better. So many loved ones reached out to help me shake off the dust and pull me up from my sad hole of depression (I’m looking at you, Karen Clark!).  It is amazing what a few weeks and a few doctor’s appointments (and new HAIR) can do for the spirit! Last Tuesday I was cleared to begin light activity and I started going for walks and doing more activity around the house. I was super pumped for my first walk; put on my workout clothes and my running shoes, got my airpods going, and made it a grand total of ⅔ mile. Honestly, that’...
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Cautiously Optimistic

So, after my giant pity-party the other day, it looks like I may be (finally!) on the mend! My CT results showed nothing remarkable, which was both relieving and frustrating. Even my doctor voiced her frustration that there was nothing fixable (and hearing her say that made my neurotic self feel so much better). My physical exam, on the other hand, showed nothing remarkable and that was a major victory ! My doctor was excited to see how much better my internal stitches looked, no swelling or other signs of infection, and NO ACTIVE BLEEDING. She said she is cautiously optimistic that I'm back on track in my recovery! Of course, I have no chill and immediately started asking about activity levels and such, so she sat down with me and a calendar and we walked through the different physical activities I can start doing each week throughout March and April. Have I mentioned that she's the best and I love her? The only catch is that I need to have no bleeding for the next five days t...
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